What's another year without me waiting about 6-8 months to blog, right? Right. Let's see, let's see. I've started my MBA at SMU and could wax poetic about people on cellphones almost broadsiding me every day. Of course, that would be horribly hypocritical since I managed to rear end someone last Friday, cellphone free. Instead I'm going to relate this puppy right back to my MBA career search, which is considered a fourth class for us. To be fair, we are paying these people almost delicious amounts of money in order to be handed a job, or at the least, interviewing skills. I took my career search in a slightly different direction today. Instead of researching careers in Marketing and Nonprofits, etc etc, I decided to analyze the advice given to me by the heavens. That's right, my horoscope will lead my foray into the working world from now on. And by golly, I'm going to like it. I've compiled the list of best careers for Virgos and we can all go ahead and judge if we think these are best for my so-called lifestyle.
1. Tax Auditor
To be completely honest, the chapter on taxes in my accounting book gave me such a headache that I vowed to punch the first government employee I could find in the face. The desire gave out ultimately due to my need for a nap, but the hostility lies latent.
2. Nutritionist
This one I probably could swing, mostly because I have a serious love for counting calories. It's like a weird little logic game. When I was a kid I used to manipulate numbers in my head to equal the number 7 and other equally stupid things, so manipulating chicken so that I don't pork up sounds like it would be right up my alley.
3. Naturopath
Ummmmmm that sounds suspiciously like "hippie". The answer is no, sir.
4. Professional Housecleaner
I am awfully gifted at cleaning things. All things said and done, it gives me a lot of satisfaction when it's finished. It's just the sweeping, wiping, vacuuming, picking up, scrubbing, and general arraignment of things in between that I dislike.
5. Executive Assistant
I'm not going to lie, I always thought I'd be good at this. I was a dynamo at office tasks while temping, so it makes sense. Besides, it would give me an opportunity to be snide on the phone, which happens sadly little.
6. Statistician
Aha, and here we find the crux of the issue. The stars say that I would be wonderful at statistics due to my naturally detail oriented nature that I happen to share with anyone born during the month of September. I could expound here about falling asleep at least three times while reading stats last night or how whenever I say something in my class my professor looks visibly strained, but instead I will leave you with this thought: I was a liberal arts major for a reason.
7, 8, 9. Archivist, Systems Analyst, Technician
I'm grouping these together because although I have a unique ability to alphabetize and file at an astounding rate, it seems just as unlikely as the other two. Although it seems they would satisfy a long held desire for a pocket protector and pair of thick-rimmed spectacles. Also, I can stereotype all I want.
10. Welder
Ah, welding. A past time from my youth that I have sadly left behind. All of those carefree days spent binding together neighbors' belongings, afternoons welding childhood romances into trees, fusing loved ones to metal appliances. The memories are indeed vivid.
Since I'm a Leo-Virgo cusp, I wonder if I should consider Leo careers as well? I don't want to confuse my hopes and dreams of being a welder with something as frivolous as misplaced astrology. What to do, what to do.
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3 comments:
I don't know, the Leo careers recommended by MSN don't seem much better . . .
actor, publicist, theatrical agent, spokesmodel, reality show personality (what is the deal with the stage-and-screencentricity?)
also: motivational speaker,
salesperson,
hairdresser,
cardiologist,
goldsmith (maybe you could specialize in welding gold?)
mmkay, now, considering the fact that I've actually written a field guide on the visual identification of weldment defects, it's not SO unreasonable that you might be a good welder.
I'd like to point out for the record that I'm currently wearing pink. So there.
Sparkly happy princess girly girl welding.
Chuck Palahniuk did lament that his liberal arts degree didn't include welding. His first job out of college was assembling trucks along with lots of other liberal arts majors, and they all wished they were qualified for the pay bump as welders. Just think, you could be doing what Chuck Palahniuk only dreamed of.
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