Monday, July 11, 2005

Manly accessories are hard to find

So Richard and I decided to go shopping whilst he was in town over July 4th. Shopping for what you ask? And I will tell you: manly accessories. What does that mean, one wonders. I have no idea and neither does Richard. He's like an artist, the mall is his palette, his style is his canvas, and I'm a snotty critic that couldn't get a real job as an artist because I have no definable talent and smoke a pack a day. We perused the Galleria at what I considered to be the gayest shops I could find, but there were no bracelets or manly jewelry available. We even shopped at Kenneth Cole for a murse, but they must have been out or something. (I wonder where Oliver got his...) Finally, we ended up at Hot Topic, a store geared toward angsty, unloved teenagers. I felt a little out of place since I wasn't 13 anymore, but tried to fit into the vibe by cursing anything too mainstream and instead joining their national chain of rebellion. At any rate, they had a Slipknot sweatband, as well as one with hearts, which was my personal favorite. Richard also wanted to get a chain wallet, which I vetoed before he could get the phrase properly out of his mouth. I almost capitulated though when we found one with a squirrel on it that said "Beware the wrath of my nuts!" Those angry squirrels... I think in the end he decided just to get a tattoo, but I wanted to get a Grumpy Bear doll. So cuddly and angry. *giggle*

Speaking of shopping, a few days ago I went to an outlet mall in the Dallas area, which is full of nice stores. They even have an Adidas outlet, whose shoes I lurve, so I was particularly happy to see that there. I scampered in with a gleeful laugh and chose some items that are very sport trendy AND massively on sale. After gathering all of my little treasures together, I proceeded up to the front register and, naturally, got the most proficient register person they had. The conversation, though short, was priceless and went as follows:

boyman: "How are you today, ma'am?"
me: "Just fine."
*noticing that he has forgotten to ring up a jacket, I push it toward him*
me: "I think you left this out"
bm: "Oh...JK!"
me: *pause while I consider saying nothing* "What?"
bm: "What?"
me: "Really? JK? Like just kidding?"
bm: "Uhhh yeah." ~sing songy voice~ "Just kidding!"
me: "You need to IM less."
bm: "What?"
me: "Less IM, more real world."
bm: "Uhhh have a nice day."

God I am only 1 year out of college and I already hate high schoolers. In other news, I watched Catwoman today and wasn't nearly as disappointed as I could have been. As I told Khris, after seeing Elektra, nothing really seems that bad. It's like the world of cinema is outer space and some stars are simply brighter than others. And Elektra is a black hole, sucking out all of the life and joy you have ever garnered from film before. And those of you who can identify my accidental pun shall be well rewarded with the promise that I will *never* make you watch that movie. Needless to say, Beck was displeased because he thinks I tricked him into seeing a chick flick. Beck, no one said it wasn't going to BE a chick flick. And you should be happy I let you gaze upon Benjamin Bratt for that time. *gargling noises*

5 comments:

Emily said...

Would that be Jennifer garnered, or just you garden variety garnered?

Good thing I don't have to watch "Elektra" - it looked much too scary for me...

Anonymous said...

UHhhhh wtf? when did caroline get a blog????? why was i not informed????

Anonymous said...

AND EMILY FOR THAT MATTER!!!!! Unloved by al!

Emily said...

*cree cree*

Awkward silence ensues...

Anonymous said...

sadly there is a dearth of all things manly in the Galleria. well, except for the bee pollen smoothies.